The minutes that lead to this nightly ritual, passing our hours away like they are nothing...these minutes are the longest for me. My mind swirls with images, colors, thoughts, sounds, noise... its like a city within my mind. Roads that lead to more thinking... buildings filled with thoughts... people shouting ranting screaming randomness... there is no silence for me... there is no mental rest. My body gets a vacation from the day, but my brain never stops... dreams take over in the night... but dream is just a term that doesn't do justice... these mental movies are more than dreams... they are intense mental plays that stream in my head... so vivid so realistic... yet I know its false, its fake, its not real. I've grown used to the terror... the gouges they leave in my thoughts...I've become numb to it. Murder...death...destruction...fear... twisting every thought in your head into something you've never seen or thought possible. What is this... who is controlling it... is this some view into an alternate universe... a parallel reality? Or is it some necessary evil that keeps us in the realm of the sane, by removing the insane while we sleep... dealing with the twisted... dealing with the emotional scars... then the nights they don't come tend to be more frightening... the nothingness gap between night and morning... the feeling of not existing... the emptiness... is cold... its unreal. Deaths little sister, holding your hand through the night... playing with your sub conscious self... keeping you under her spell... keeping you separated from mental hell... sweet "dreams"... "good"night.
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